whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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