I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
