Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
