maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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