My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize