Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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