he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
