hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Hippo gnu deer
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
