just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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