PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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