Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
