wrigley field is MILF paradise
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
