There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
