apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
