kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Drake has all the answers
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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