In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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