talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
