i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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