you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize