she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
