She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm like, not good at living.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
