Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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