If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
