VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
