Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
