3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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