I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
