He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
