i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Randomize
