My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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