it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
