i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
