how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
