let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
