Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
you inspire me to be a worse person
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
