White coat. Heels.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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