found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
So many bounce houses so little time
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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