A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
