So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
