there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize