Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
