handjob tips. give me some.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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