last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
