Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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