you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
They have beer where we have blood.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
