Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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