yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I just blew my weed a kiss
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
