i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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