"it" just moved
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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