im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
So many bounce houses so little time
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Blood and glitter go together right?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
