I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
